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I'll Look After Myself For You, If You Look After Yourself For Me

by Ben Harris-Hayes

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1.
An Outro Instead Of An Intro 04:39
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2.
Never Enough Time For Everything We Want To Do 05:50
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I feel it's falling apart. Even as I speak. Something moved in my heart. It's cold and I'm flinching. I can't quite grasp...what's happened. And as much I deny...I deny myself. Never wanted the fire, To be able to breathe... Never wanted to be a liar, But it's got you through life... So, just say when... Just say when... Amen... Amen... And I know I let this start, Medicated...and the sound of the lonesome. And now I can't tell them apart... This feeling...of aching. It seeded and bloomed, Into a grey, empty space. And as much I deny...I deny myself.
3.
I'm Never Far Away 02:13
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4.
How It Feels To Be With You 03:08
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5.
In Sickness, In Health 02:46
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6.
Saying Goodbye Is The Hardest Thing To Do 06:27
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7.
Love The Same 04:50
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Drifting along... A daydream, another song... Clipping our wings by soaring to close to the Sun, Falling below... And in this...is a hope. But within this...I draw the rope, tighter. Within this, is the line that I daren't cross. Yet within this... On my soul, I won't dare go. On my soul, I won't leave you alone. But understand that it hurts sometimes, And when it takes hold... I'm lost... And I can't... And I can't love the same... Oh... The irony.... Comes twofold... In the name of my love... (Love) I try... And in the name of my love...
8.
I'll Look After Myself For You 05:53
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9.
If You Look After Yourself For Me 01:43
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10.
Hold On To Me At The End Of The World 04:37
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about

"I'll Look After Myself For You, If You Look After Yourself For Me" is the title of the musical score for a film that never made it to release.
(The film itself had a much different title)


The film itself told the tale of a couple who met through chance, developed a loving and honest relationship over a long number of years...and then one of them found out they were ill and were going to die as a result of the illness.

The relationship slipped away as they lost the ability to communicate because of fear, self-preservation, and doing what they thought was right when it, perhaps, was not.

The ill person kept the sickness a secret for as long as he could in his belief that he didn't want to harm his partner...but eventually he kept pushing her away because he didn't want her to have her deal with his death...but in doing what he thought was best for her; it drove a wedge between them when all they needed was each others love.

The male makes several attempts to take his own life in his misguided belief that it would be easier for her to hate him for doing that than to have her suffer the drawn-out agony of his slow demise; chiefly, because he couldn't bear to see her suffer that journey.

His efforts to die confused her because she believed they were in a loving relationship with a strong future and she was not sure where his change of mood and outlook on life came from all of a sudden.

The musical score contains full songs that are used over certain scenes and also showcases pieces of music that were used for"what if?" scenario scenes where they are individually thinking about the hope for the future they believed they had and all the things they'd do together...and equally, there are pieces that showcase the sadness and confusion for greeting one's mortality.

The film showed the fragile nature of relationships and how communication is utterly vital...even when it seems the hardest thing to do.


The score was created using a lot of different instrumentation, ranging from using a piano to create percussion/beats by hitting it in different places through to the usual synths, traditional orchestration, and more.

Score by Benedict Harris-Hayes

credits

released February 19, 2024

All instrumentation, arrangement, lyrics, and music by Benedict Harris-Hayes

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all rights reserved

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Ben Harris-Hayes Brighton, UK

Multi-instrumentalist singer/songwriter, who rides many different genres and styles.
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OCEANICA -

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(Electronica/Dance)
MASS!VE DYNAMIC - ... more

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